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What’s in it for me? Learn valuable tools for personal growth that will help you live your best life.

Okay, here’s the bad news. We’re living in pretty difficult times. The world is more connected and yet more divided than ever before. Hate is prevalent and negativity rife.

So what’s the good news? By changing your perspective and your approach to life, you can rewrite the narrative and move forward with positivity and purpose.

In This Is How We Do It, entertainment icon Kevin Hart offers readers the tools to become the best version of themselves they can be. Combining his signature humor with the knowledge he’s gained from life’s hardest lessons, Hart shares a new way of thinking built around authentic, positive change.

While the book features fifteen core tools, this Blink will focus on a select few. This way, we’ll be able to delve a bit deeper into the ideas that are most likely to help you create a new, healthy mindset and put it into practice. By the time we’re finished, you’ll be armed with the skills and motivation to really get the ball rolling.

Everyone has the potential to transform their life and the journey starts within. Ready to get started? Let’s go.

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Positivity will set you free.

Let’s start things off with Kevin Hart’s most important tool – one that’s easily accessible, but rarely practiced. It may seem simple at first, but it has the power to change your entire way of life. In fact, if you don’t embrace this tool, then none of the other advice you learn today will matter.

What is this magical cure-all? A positive mindset.

Let’s face it, negativity is everywhere. Especially in the hyper-connected age of social media – all you have to do is scroll down to any comment section to see it.

We’re living in a unique part of human history where “shit-talking” is at an all-time high. Not only is this causing us to constantly doubt ourselves, but it’s actually triggering the fight or flight reflexes in our brains that fear rejection from others.

This negative energy is so toxic that a lot of people simply try to avoid it. And while this may work in the short run, it’s not a sustainable way to live. Negativity is so prevalent in our society that, to completely avoid it, you’d have to settle for a life of doing nothing.

If we sacrifice our dreams and goals because we fear being criticized or judged, we waste our own lives worrying about other people. The solution is not to avoid negativity, but to acknowledge it and decide to thrive anyway.

That’s why Hart’s most fundamental tool is having a positive mindset. Choosing positivity means that you move through life without getting stuck. While other people might bury their head in the sand or walk in circles, you’ll be able to keep moving forward toward your best future free of fear.

Don’t get the wrong idea though – having a positive attitude doesn’t mean you’ll be skipping down the street with a smile on your face every single day. It means seeing the challenges in your life from the bright side; accepting the fact that sometimes life is really hard; and not letting your bad days defeat you.

Hart considers himself a prime example of how a change in mindset can lead to bigger and better things. He was never meant to be where he is today – a renowned actor, author and entrepreneur. In theory, he should never have escaped his rough neighborhood.

Throughout his life, he’s been through the harshest of storms – tossed around and knocked to the ground more times than he can count. What matters is that he chose to get back up and dust himself off, every single time.

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Be reliable with your time and commitments.

Now, be really honest with yourself: can people count on you to show up on time? If the answer is yes, you’re already off to a great start. If it’s a reluctant no – you’ve got some work to do.

Unfortunately, in this chaotic era that we’re living in, reliability and consistency have fallen by the wayside. Being truly reliable requires a good relationship with time and taking responsibility to live up to your obligations. And this involves knowing your limits and how to say no.

You shouldn’t be expected to do everything people ask of you, but it’s also your responsibility to know what you can and can’t accomplish. If you agree to do something, you need to be sure that it’s actually achievable. If you’re stretching yourself too thin, learn to get comfortable with turning people down.

You’re probably cringing at the thought of doing that. In fact, most people are so afraid of disappointing others that they say yes to everything and ultimately lose their sense of self in the process. What they don’t understand is that humans are naturally drawn to people who have their priorities in order, because it means we can trust them.

One thing Hart prides himself on is his ability to be on time. If he’s expected to show up on a movie set, he’ll be there well before his call-time. Why? Because he doesn’t want to waste anyone’s time – and he holds everyone else to the same standard.

Everything we do in this life has an impact and the way we act leaves an impression on the people around us. When you show up for other people, they’ll show up for you. So take a moment to think about the message you’re sending out into the world. Can the people in your life really rely on you?

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Cowboy up to take ownership of your life.

The first two tools were pretty basic self-help concepts that you’ve definitely heard before. This next one is a bit more original.

Hart’s idea of “cowboying up” is about taking ownership of not only your words and actions, but every aspect of your life. To truly know yourself, you have to settle in and face reality.

The problem is that many people refuse to do this. Taking ownership is so uncomfortable for them that they spend their whole lives running away from it. They’re terrified of looking in the mirror and acknowledging that they’re not perfect. At some point in all of our lives, we will inevitably screw up.

But when we fail, the discomfort is only temporary – something we often forget. If we can make it through the rough part, what comes afterward is real, authentic growth. There’s freedom and power in being able to admit you were wrong and fix your mistakes.

Taking ownership also means acknowledging that no argument is ever truly one-sided.

Hart admits that he didn’t always think this way. During arguments in the past, he would automatically default to feeling like the victim. Now, he stops and takes the time to ask himself a few important questions.

“How did I contribute to this?” “How might my actions have created this situation?” “Next time, how can I better communicate my needs or boundaries so that this doesn’t happen again?” When you stop and ask yourself these questions, fights and misunderstandings become opportunities for improvement.

You may or may not know that Hart was caught cheating on his wife. Most public figures would try to keep this out of the press, but Hart doesn’t shy away from talking about it. Instead, he’s chosen to acknowledge it, apologize for his mistakes, and vow to do better.

At the end of the day, you are the only person who can change your life. Take a moment to really let this thought sink in. If you spend your time waiting for someone else to change your life for you, you’ll be waiting forever.

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Be a teddy bear for the people around you.

So we’ve already covered cowboys, now let’s move on to teddy bears. You’re probably wondering what on earth a teddy bear could teach you about living your best life.

Well, think about what teddy bears mean to kids – comfort, affection, and feelings of safety. Teddy bears make us feel good. “Teddy bearing” – as Hart calls it – means being a pleasant, likable human being. Simple as that. And making the people around you feel happy is one of the fastest ways to create a more peaceful, harmonious life for yourself too.

It’s important to note that you shouldn’t be trying to get people to like you. Wanting to be universally liked is playing a losing game. You’re not going to get along with everyone you meet. Not everyone is going to want to spend time with you. Not everyone is going to believe in you and that’s okay. Get comfortable with the idea that if you don’t vibe with someone, it’s not the worst thing in the world.

Wanting to be liked is an external goal. Being likable is internal. It’s an unconditional love for yourself that radiates self-respect and internal power. Being heavily influenced by other people is a weak mindset to have. Instead, replace it with the power to let negativity slide off your back.

So go ahead – be a cute, cuddly teddy bear. Positivity energy is so rare a find these days that it will naturally draw people to you like moths to a flame. And the people who stick around – they’re the ones who are truly meant to be by your side.

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Dissatisfaction keeps you in a steady state of growth.

It might seem contradictory to everything we’ve just talked about, but Hart’s next piece of advice is to always stay dissatisfied.

If this seems weird to you, that’s normal. Hart admits that this concept is pretty easy to misunderstand. He’s not saying that you should be miserable and unhappy with the way things are in your life. He just means that you should be able to stop and say, “Things are pretty great, but I know I can do better.”

No matter how happy or successful you are, there’s always room for growth. Everything in the world around us is either growing or decaying. That’s the circle of life. It’s up to you to decide which state you want to live in.

For example, Hart was once offered a role in a major movie. It was a project that he would have been incredibly excited about a few years earlier, but it didn’t fit the direction he felt he was going at the time. Hart wanted to be challenged. He wanted to grow.

So, he declined the project and took a risk by accepting a part in a film called The Upside. This was a dramatic role – something he definitely wasn’t used to – but it introduced him to a new group of actors and forced him to rise to the occasion. In the end, the movie was a success. Not only did it give Hart the chance to step outside his comfort zone, it also showed him what he was capable of if he put his mind to it.

A truly healthy mindset is one that desires learning, improvement, and expansion. Stagnation might be more comfortable, but it’s not going to get you where you want to go. Dissatisfaction keeps us on the edge – the only place where we can truly feel alive.

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Stay humble as you work toward your goals.

So what happens if we utilize these tools, grind our way to the top, and reach success? Does the work stop? Absolutely not.

The last tool we’re going to talk about is humility – something that becomes incredibly important as we begin to reach our goals.

Success has a funny way of grabbing hold of people and turning them into something they’re not. As the spotlight grows brighter, we can lose sight of who we are and what’s really important. Having worked in the entertainment industry for so many years, Hart has seen this happen to a lot of his colleagues. He’s seen them demand absurd things for absolutely no reason and run other people ragged, just because they can.

Hart even admits that he’s occasionally caught himself being swept away by his success. There have been moments when he’s wanted to walk into a room and have everyone stop and say, “Oh my god, that’s Kevin Hart!” The key is that he has chosen to learn from these experiences. To stop and think about what type of person he truly wants to be.

Once again, it’s important to realize that other people’s opinions shouldn’t drive you. If you’re putting on a show to make people admire you, then the things you’ve achieved won’t mean anything. The only way to truly find happiness in this life is to focus on the things that really matter to you.

Humility is the key to staying grounded, even when your circumstances are lifting you onto a pedestal. And it’s not hard to practice it – you just need to remember one fundamental truth: no one is better or worse than anyone else. We’re all just people.

You have your journey and someone else will have theirs. There’s never any need for two journeys to end in conflict. Let’s focus on lifting each other up, not tearing each other down.

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Final Summary

Hart’s tools aren’t like that power drill you bought for sporadic DIY projects. They’re intended for daily use, to form a new way of thinking, feeling, and simply being. It’s on this new, sturdy foundation that you can build a better life for yourself and the people around you.

At its core, this foundation is centered on becoming the best version of yourself and inspiring others to do the same. Being reliable will make you someone others can count on. Cowboying up will help you take ownership of your life. Becoming a teddy bear will allow you to bring comfort and safety to the people who matter most.

As you start to reach your goals, dissatisfaction can help you to continue evolving and humility will keep you grounded. On top of all this, positivity will help you approach every challenge you face from the bright side.

The world might be difficult right now, but we all have the power to make it a better place – one small step at a time.